There are many scriptures that speak about the way we relate to each other. How do I see my brothers and my sisters? How do I treat them? Paul encourages the believers in Colosse to put something on. It is like a description of a wardrobe containing different clothes that we are supposed to wear in dealing with one another. Let us briefly consider and apply what Paul has to say: “Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any should have a complaint against any; even as the Christ has forgiven you, so also do ye. And to all these add love, which is the bond of perfectness.”
Who we are
Paul starts by telling us who we are. Before we deal with others, it is always good to consider who we are and who others are, and how God has dealt (and deals) with us and with them. Paul mentions three things, and these form the background to his encouragements that follow.
We are God’s elect people. Christian election is a personal matter. God has not elected the church but individual believers. Our election originates in eternity and has to do with eternity (Eph. 1:4–5). The fact that God has elected us shows clearly that we have great value in His eyes. We should deal with each other in that light, and not forget that we — and our brothers and sisters — have great value in His estimation.
We are holy. Holiness has to do with our position before God and with our practical lives. We are holy, and we should live in a holy manner. In this verse, it is a matter of our position. In God’s eyes we are holy. This applies to me as well as to all who are born of God. We are set apart and belong to Him. Holiness has to do with ownership. In dealing with each other we should not forget the One to whom we all belong.
We are beloved. God has not only loved us in the past; He still loves us. We are objects of His tender care and affection. We should not forget this in our dealings with each other. God loves me, and I should love my brothers and sisters in that light — with the love with which He has loved me. If this is the case, it will characterize my attitudes and behavior towards them.
“Put on”
The encouragement is to put something on. Three brief remarks on this:
- Firstly, what I have put on should be seen. My attitudes towards my brothers and sisters come from the heart (the inner man), but at the same time they should be seen in practice in the ways in which we treat each other.
- Secondly, to put on is not something we do once for all and never change. It is an ongoing process and a daily challenge. We must always be characterised by putting on the different clothes in this wonderful Christian wardrobe.
- Thirdly, it is not a matter of choosing only the clothes we like and never wearing the others. We must take from the whole wardrobe. We can compare this to the Christian armour. All its different parts are needed. We cannot afford to miss any of the following items.
Bowels of compassion
Compassion is mercy, and it should come from the heart. If anyone is going through difficult circumstances — difficulty or distress of one kind or another — we should sympathize with them. In this way, we put it on like an item of clothing. The perfect example is our Lord Jesus Himself. When He was on earth He was “moved with compassion” (Matt. 9:36). This is exactly what Paul sets before us in our text. Our inner man (our heart) should be moved if we see that our brother or sister is suffering. We cannot be indifferent to their need, but rather we should have right feelings of mercy and practically express these.
Kindness
To be kind means to be good and to show goodness to others. It was the “kindness and love to man of our Savior God” that appeared in the person of Jesus Christ (Titus 3:4). It was the goodness (or, kindness — it is the same word) of God that once led us to repentance (Rom. 2:4). As imitators of God (Eph. 5:1) we should have the same attitude to our brothers and sisters. No matter whether they are in need or not, we should deal with them in a way that aims for their best interests.
Lowliness
This was one of the key character traits of our Lord Jesus when He was here on earth. It was His mind not to seek His own, but that of others (Phil. 2:4–5). This is the best definition of lowliness or humility. It does not mean thinking in a negative and deprecating way of ourselves, but it is not thinking of ourselves at all. We will never be able to do this from within ourselves. This is why our Lord said: “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me; for I am meek and lowly in heart” (Matt. 11:29). It is only as we fix our eyes on Him that this character trait can be developed in us.
Meekness
This again can only be learned if we turn our eyes upon our Lord. To be meek means to react in a tender way if we are attacked by others. A meek person is not weak but someone who reacts in a reserved and gentle manner. When our Lord was reviled, He reviled not again; when He suffered, He threatened not (1 Pet. 2:23). The example of Moses (who was very meek, more than all the men upon the earth; Num. 12:3) makes it very clear that meekness is not a natural characteristic but a virtue that can only be learned in God’s school and exercised by faith. How many quarrels could have been avoided if we had reacted to each other more in meekness (Prov. 15:1).
Longsuffering
Longsuffering is patience. Let us consider the divine example again. God Himself is longsuffering (1 Pet. 3:20). So is our Lord Jesus (2 Pet. 3:15). He gave the proof of it when He was here on earth. Longsuffering is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22). The word really means: “long in suffering”. It has to do with forbearing as well as patience. To be lowly and to be meek are not things we can display occasionally, here and there, but are consistent traits. Someone who is long-suffering and patient demonstrates a kind of endurance and perseverance. He will not easily get annoyed but is ready to bear with others in love.
Forbearing one another
Longsuffering will lead to exactly this. To forbear the other does not only mean to be ready to bear the burdens of others, but also to bear with their weaknesses. This is exactly what the Lord Jesus did with His disciples. They had a lot of flaws but He was ready to bear with them. It may even be that we must bear with the brother himself if he has become a burden to others. And we should not forget that Paul says: “forbearing one another”. This is not a “one-way street”. Today, I may be the one who must do this; tomorrow, I may be the one who must be borne with by others.
Forgiving one another
Paul continues: “if any should have a complaint against any; even as the Christ has forgiven you, so also do ye”. This may be the most difficult of these injunctions. It presumes that my brother (or my sister) has sinned against me. How did our Lord react when He was nailed to that shameful and cruel cross? He prayed for His enemies: “Father, forgive them” (Luke 23:34). He sets the example. Therefore, our standard is: “as Christ has forgiven [us]’! And how has He forgiven us? Firstly, He did it completely. Secondly, He did it immediately. Thirdly, He did it willingly — from the depths of His heart. How do we forgive one another? Yes, unfortunately, it is the case that we sin against each other. If so, we should be ready to confess (in case we have sinned) and to forgive (if the other has sinned). To forgive means to grant the grace to take something away. Therefore, the one who forgives exercises grace, and the one who is forgiven receives grace.
Love — the bond of perfectness
There is still something to add to all these traits: love. This needs a reason, and the reason is not found in us but in God. John says: “Beloved, if God has so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 John 4:11). I will always find something in my brother and my sister which does not invite me to show love. But there is no need to wait for an invitation. Because the love of God has been poured out in my heart, I can love the other without finding a reason in him or her to do so. Love is the bond of perfectness. Love is not everything, but without love everything is nothing.
The opening verses of 1 Corinthians 13 make it very clear that we must add love. We could do the greatest things in the eyes of others: speak with tongues of men and of angels, have all prophecies, understand all mysteries and knowledge, have all faith and dole out all our goods in food, and even deliver up our bodies for others — but if it is all without love, it is nothing. We can wear all these wonderful articles of clothing from the Christian wardrobe but it will not be of great benefit to others or help ourselves if we do not have love. Let us therefore encourage one another not only to express these wonderful character traits but add love to them all as we do so.
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